#PositivePractice: Why I Don’t Believe in “Resolutions”

It's that time of year again where we take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves who we want to be and what we want to accomplish in the new year.

I'm already seeing them everywhere...New Years resolutions; a checklist of things to 'resolve' with a vehement intention of starting 2019 off on the right foot.

But here's the thing. I don't believe in "resolutions". By definition, a resolution is the process of resolving; the action of solving a problem, dispute, or contentious matter. Our resolutions present themselves as problems that need to be fixed (not eating healthy, need to fix it; spending too much time on social media, need to fix it)...but what happens when we can't "fix" those problems? They subconsciously become even bigger ones.

resolutions
resolutions

What I DO Believe In

I think it's important to flip the underlying negative connotation that comes with a resolution, and instead look at our goals as a conscious practice; objectives we continuously work to meet (not just every year on January 1).

In turn, when we encounter a bump in the road, we're able to smooth it out as we continue practicing what we set out to do, instead of feeling like we failed when it can't be fixed.

What do you think? Could you get on board with this mindset?

Recap of My Last
#PositivePractice

Read the post: #POSITIVEPRACTICE: SETTING YOUR DAILY INTENTION

A few months ago, I set out to form a new habit of setting a daily intention. Spoiler alert...intentions were definitely not set daily. That being said, in the handful of times each month that I took the time to set an intention, I saw an unwavering shift in my mood and outlook for that day.

I found that I often set intentions on the days when stress and anxiety was high, and that they helped bring me back to a more balanced and level-headed state. Definitely something I plan to continue to do.

resolution
resolution

 

Being Present

I am THE definition of a creature of habit. I wake up, go to work (day job), come home, go to work (blog), go to sleep, and repeat. Of course, there's the in between, but those 5 points are the major focuses of every single one of my days, typically 6-7 days a week.

When I'm working, I'm 100% IN what I'm doing, and given the fact that work takes up my days and my nights, that means I'm 100% OUTof reality and home life.

Over the holiday, I made the decision to shut down in all aspects and be present with my family. The first day I found myself reaching for my phone, but after that, I never looked back. It opened my eyes to what I had been missing and taught me a few valuable lessons that I'm going to consciously work to not lose sight of.

Of course, I knew I was going to have to reconnect, but this time, my goal is to reconnect to work/blog/social media without disconnecting from my personal life.

MY PERSONAL PROCESS

My career work hours are what they are: 9-6, I'm here and work is my focus.

From 6 on, however, I'm working on taking the main focus of my night off of my blog, and instead breaking up my night to include things like cooking dinner, slotting in time for a workout, self-care, and spending time with Joe before we hit the pillow.

I'm following a loose schedule of sorts so that everything can happen but still makes sense. For example, I'll cook and get a workout in before Joe comes home, work on the blog while he works out (which is always right when he gets home) and then take time for self-care, relaxing with Joe after that.

Whereas before, I would sit up working on my blog until 11 (Joe would already be in bed and sleeping), I'm going to put a cap on it, and it's going to be damn hard to do.

resolution
resolution

TIPS FOR BEING PRESENT

1. Identify the moment - take a minute to check in with yourself and assess where you're at.

2. Reduce distractions - put your phone down, hide it, whatever you need to do! (mine is my biggest distraction)

3. Find balance between flowing and planning - schedules are important, but it's okay to stray

4. Prioritize what's best for your mental and physical health, like treating yourself, spending time with family, etc.

SO...thoughts? Do you feel like you need to practice being present or do you feel like you've found your balance? If you have, I'd love for you to share your tips!

What other practices are you currently implementing? Would love to hear your ideas for this lifestyle series and open up the discussion.

resolution
resolution


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24 Comments

  1. January 14, 2019 / 9:54 am

    I love this idea of looking at goals as a conscious practice and really focusing on that! I am trying to be much more positive this year and I think that is such a good outlook to have!

    Denise | Fashion Love Letters

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 14, 2019 / 2:04 pm

      Couldn’t agree more Denise! I think that’s the perfect place to start 🙂

  2. Kristina
    January 10, 2019 / 10:25 pm

    First of all, these photos are adorable!! And I’m with you on the goals and being more present- for me I know I need to reduce screen time and be better about time management!

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 11, 2019 / 10:44 am

      Thanks so much Kristina! Reducing screen time is so major for me – being in from of a phone or a computer is like second nature – def have to work on that myself!

  3. January 9, 2019 / 9:27 am

    I try to set intentions for myself, especially over the last few months. For me, balance and love are two I fall back on quite often because I find them to be so essential to my Life. I try to practice love and kindness as much as possible. And balance is a word I think everyone needs more of in their life. I also think that resolutions shouldn’t be something you tick off a box and never do anything with again. If you want to read more, read more with the intention of learning and growing as an individual and creative. Let it part of who you are all the time…and for many years! Not just for one year!

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 10, 2019 / 10:12 am

      I love this…so perfectly put, Kiara! It should be a constant process of growth.

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 10, 2019 / 10:05 am

      Can’t argue with that lady!

  4. Laura Leigh
    January 8, 2019 / 5:26 pm

    Absolutely love this! I am with you on not making resolutions – just not fan. However, I do set goals/plans. I am loving your intention to be more present. Definitely need to work on that as well! Happy New Year lady!

    xo Laura Leigh
    Louella Reese

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 10, 2019 / 10:03 am

      Goals are so important – totally on board for that too!

  5. Kelsey
    January 8, 2019 / 8:48 am

    LOVEEE these tips!! I so agree, it’s super important to be present!!

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:56 am

      Thanks Kelsey! I think it all gets away from us, esp as bloggers, so definitely a major goal for me this year 🙂

  6. January 8, 2019 / 7:40 am

    I totally agree with you. I have been setting goals, whether it’s weekly, monthly or for the year. I love the being present, it’s wonderful and attainable to meet.

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:54 am

      Absolutely…I think attainable is so key!

  7. January 8, 2019 / 1:08 am

    I totally agree and I love the idea of setting intentions! I’d love to try to work on that this year and also on being more present!

    Kileen
    cute & little

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:38 am

      Setting intentions have done nothing short of set me up for successes (no matter how big or small). Definitely recommend giving it a try this year! 🙂

  8. Stephanie
    January 7, 2019 / 6:36 pm

    I 100% agree with your take on resolutions. That’s how I’ve been feeling for several years now, and instead I’ve worked on reaching daily and monthly goals I set for myself. It’s been great practice on being one with the most important aspects of my life. I also love how you’re working hard to remain present. It can be challenging, and I can only imagine the difficulty with a busy life such as yours. Quite impressive, I might add, that you are already putting that into practice!

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:37 am

      Love the idea of daily and monthly goals..it’s so much more realistic to me; and I’m *working* on putting being present into practice, but rest assured I def have a long way to go!

  9. January 7, 2019 / 3:23 pm

    I don’t believe in resolutions either and I’m all for a positive practices! Being present is high on my list too!

    http://www.rdsobsessions.com

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:36 am

      I think so many of us need to work on being present (I know I do in a major way)! Hope this encouraged you to do so!! xo

  10. ashley hargrove
    January 7, 2019 / 2:40 pm

    I am literally working on a similar post right now. I despise resolutions… I think they are so silly and just setting ourselves up for failure instead of being motivated to make attainable goals.

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:35 am

      Couldn’t agree more. I think it’s just ingrained in us to think “resolutions” when a new year rolls around, but I think we’d see much more success with them if we flipped the script.

  11. January 7, 2019 / 10:21 am

    I am with you totally. I don’t believe in resolutions either. I believe in lifestyle choices and finding a sustainable way to achieve it. Sometimes having a deadline works, but most of my goals are for life. One can’t stop working on themselves ever, right? 🙂

    ❥ tanvii.com

    • Danielle
      Author
      January 8, 2019 / 9:34 am

      Absolutely…I love how you put that too!

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